Monday, October 29, 2012

On a dodgy day when you haven't contributed to society...or seemed to get yourself totally together before the day is over, you'll need to remember this. To immediately win the Nobel Prize.

Our life got flipped, turned upside down and I'd like to take a minute..just sit right here and tell you how I actually baked something that didn't suck.

I have a thing for blackberries. Always have. When I was a little girl, my dad and I would 'go looking' for wild ones in the woods behind my grandparents' house. And then I'd race Dad back to the house and I'd get dusted. Every time. It was our thing. I was always amazed by how fast he was. But I believe I've discussed, at some point, just how slow I am. Was. Have always been. Will be for eternity. Concrete blocks in sand, my feet. 1st eaten in zombie apocalypse slow. Anyway.

We had an unfortunate grout issue (boring myself to death, already) in our master bath a few weeks ago and have since been subject to many early-morning, loud, long repairs which rendered us housebound for much of the day. My banter with workmen before 8:00 a.m.? Don't buy a ticket to that show.

Anyway. We baked.

(Instead of drinking blackberry beer.. because up until now, that's how my 'thing' has manifested itself. Or just buying it at Harris Teeter and waiting longingly for an opportunity to drink it, which never comes. Because the only thing harder than waking up at 12, 2, and 4 with a teething baby is doing so with any amount of alcohol in your body.)

Ah, yes..:

A blackberry cobbler that's changed our lives.

It's basically Pioneer Woman's, but I found myself with no regular flour and used Bisquick instead. Then I tried it with flour, but I like Bisquick better. Holds together better.

Do this. If you do nothing else on a cold, Fall day, do this.

Preheat oven to 350.

Butter a 8x8 or a 9x9 baking dish.

Stick that stick of butter in the microwave and melt it.

Meanwhile, mix together 1 cup of sugar and 1 cup of Bisquick.

Slowly incorporate one cup of milk into the sugar and Bisquick. You can slosh it all in there at one time, but it's going to be lumpy that way. Whatev. It's your bicep.

Slowly incorporate melted butter.

Pour the whole shebang into the buttered baking dish.

Evenly sprinkle two cups of blackberries on top. Or raspberries. Or both. Two cups.


Evenly sprinkle 1/4 cup of sugar on top. If you skip this, you may as well throw the whole thing in the trashcan and hang your head in shame.  Or yank it out of the oven and pretend you didn't forget, if it's not too late. No, it'll still be fine... but shameful.

Cook it for an hour... or a little less is OK, too. I usually take it out at 45 minutes. You're looking for a little more than golden brown. And a little panicky (did I burn this, dammit??!) brown around the edges of the dish.

This is a total Courtney-approved recipe because if you overcook it a little, it's still great. And if you undercook it a little bit, that's alright, too, b/c it doesn't have egg and won't kill you dead. Just let it cool a little before you eat it and it'll still hold together OK.

Prepare to gain 5 lbs. in a month.

Make haste, while the blackberries and raspberries don't cost an arm and a leg.

You're welcome.

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Come on over and lemme teach you howta cook.

Because what could be easier, right? A can of pie fillin' - pick whichever one you like! and a box of Angel Food cake. 350. 25 minutes. Boom. ..Also? Zero Weight Watcher points for one piece. So there's that.


And this!

(obtained in the frantic pulling out of said cake as it rose approximately ONE CUBIC FOOT in the oven and threatened to, literally, stick to the top if I didn't pull it out RIGHT THEN, still jiggly as all get out)

Oh, that burn is gonna be lookin' mighty hot and open-a-vein-scar-like on Saturday night for my 10 year high school reunion. The planning of which, ironically, would make some do just that.

Zero points.

Nailed it.